Two weeks ago my grandma passed away. It’s been an interesting two weeks. I have been struggling how to write this post. For the last several years I’ve seen her go downhill, and for the last few years I have been in denial. Not denial that she would pass away, but denial that I had already said goodbye and was going to be ok when she passed away. In my mind I knew that she would pass away sooner rather than later, and so mentally I had thought that I had prepared myself for the inevitable conclusion.
Two weeks ago my grandma passed away, and it hit me harder than I thought it would. Granted I have been blessed that I have made it to 31 years old without losing any of my close relatives. Up until this point all four of my grandparents were living. I feel funny writing about the grief that I am going through as I realize how blessed I am to have so little death in my family.
Two weeks ago my grandma passed away. This grandma taught me how to iron my clothes. This grandma taught me how to cook Indian food. This grandma taught me that presentation of food is just as important as taste. This grandma taught me how to host a gathering. This grandma taught me how to properly set a table. This grandma celebrated my birthday and my brothers birthday with us even when it wasn’t our birthdays. This grandma took us camping. This grandma encouraged my brother and me to act out Bible stories even if it was just for her and grandpa. This grandma was so much to me. And to see her go downhill was so hard for me.
Two weeks ago my grandma passed away. As soon as I was told she was in the hospital and would be going into a nursing home my family drove up to where she was. On the Sunday we arrived she recognized me, my wife, and my daughter. She knew who we were. She was happy to see us. It was good to see her, even though it was hard to see her. That would be the last time I would see her.
Two weeks ago my grandma passed away. She passed away April 20, early in the morning. My mother called me after I had come back home. After Sunday she didn’t recognize anyone. After I had seen her she went downhill much more quickly.
Two weeks ago my grandma passed away. There will always be a hole in my heart. But the words of Paul in 1 Thessalonians 4 ring in my ears:
But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope. For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we shall always be with the Lord. Therefore comfort one another with these words.
1 Thessalonians 4:13, 16-18
Two weeks ago my grandma passed away. But someday soon I will see her again. Someday soon when Christ comes she will be raised up in complete health. Someday soon she will rise up when Christ sounds that trumpet and I will see her again. What a glorious day that will be!